


Unwarranted Glorification

by Intangible7



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (Comics), The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Sex, Angst, Bisexual Carl Grimes, Bisexual Negan (Walking Dead), Bisexual Rick Grimes, Blood and Gore, Blood and Torture, Blood and Violence, Bottom Carl Grimes, Bottom Rick, Consensual Underage Sex, Eventual Smut, F/M, First Time, Jealous Carl Grimes, Long, M/M, Murder, Negan Being Negan (Walking Dead), No Incest, Pining, Possessive Negan (Walking Dead), Protective Negan (Walking Dead), Sad Carl Grimes, Serial Killers, Sex, Sexy Negan (Walking Dead), Slow Build, Slow Burn, Teen Carl Grimes, Teenage Drama, Top Negan, Top Rick Grimes, Underage - Freeform, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex, Worship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-30
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2020-12-16 16:47:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21039479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Intangible7/pseuds/Intangible7
Summary: "I scared the piss outta you that night didn't I?" He paused for a second. "And you love your parents and you wouldn't let anything happen to them. I trust that you will keep me and my men from busting their heads open like a fucking pinata. It's the way it is, and you'll just have to live with that." Negan said with a taunting voice.-Carl finds out his hot new neighbor is the leader of a gang. He stumbles upon the gruesome things that Negan gets up to in the dark cover of night. Negan is amused when he finds out and is determined to make Carl's life a living hell. While Negan messes with the teen, he is dodging Rick's investigation of the recent murders in the area.Worst of all, Negan has a slight thing for Carl's dad.





	1. The Warehouse

**Author's Note:**

> As you can see, I'm making the chapters hella long. I just want to take a new approach to this and it helps me write more if I have a goal in mind. This was written in a span of a month and the next chapter is already started. 
> 
> Please let me know if you like this by kudos and comments. I'd love to hear any feedback that you have, whether you love it or hate it. 
> 
> Thanks and I hope you enjoy.
> 
> ((This story is not related to my The Criminal series))

Carl was, for the most part, very independent. He didn't rely on his mother and father for much, besides a place to live. They were overbearing more often than not. He had a curfew of ten o'clock; who the hell went to bed at ten o'clock at his age. He wished they were more like Enid's parents, she didn't have to sneak out of her window because she left through the front door, unlike him. She'd take him on adventures, insisting he needed to live a little, which she was right. If it wasn't for Enid, he'd be one of those kids that studied in his room all day.

Thank God for Enid.

"Carl." The teen heard a voice say at his doorway. Did he mention that he wasn't allowed to have his door closed? His mother didn't believe in closed doors, which was fucking stupid. Rick continued to speak, "Lori and I are goin' across the street to meet the new neighbor."

Carl held back the deepest eye roll on the planet. They were so nosey. They saw a moving truck about a week and a half ago, but have yet to see the neighbor attached to it. "They clearly don't want to be seen, I bet it's some old recluse who doesn't want to be bothered."

"Even so, it's polite."

"Dad, what's more polite than giving someone the space they clearly desire?"

Now Rick looked like he was ready to give the eyeroll of the century, but he held back. "I came here to ask if you wanted to join us." He sighed, already knowing the answer. 

"You know I don't want too." Carl snorted, picking his comic book back up.

"What if they have a son you can hang out with? You only ever hang out with girls Carl, maybe if you-"

"Wha-?" Carl interrupted Rick. "What is that supposed to mean? What's wrong with hanging out with just girls?"

"Nothing, Carl. Enid and Beth are great, but don't you want a best friend that's a guy? Like me and Shane."

Carl frowned, "Mom put you up to this didn't she? She's been promoting this 'Carl is gay' bullshit for a year now, don't try and deny it. What makes me gay?"

"Carl, language!" Rick said sternly. "She just thinks it's odd that you don't have any interest in dating, or hanging out and… just being a guy. Carl, if you are, you can tell me." Rick's voice was softer than normal. 

"How did a talk about visiting the neighbor end with questioning my sexuality?" Carl deflected. He crossed his arms an all too real sign that he was holding his ground on this one and didn't want to speak anymore. 

"Okay… I'm sorry. It's just, your mother worries." Rick sighed, "We'll be right back, okay? "

Carl nodded, picking up his comic book once more. 

He hated the way his parents saw him, but at the same time their stupid conclusions had lead him to question his sexuality on multiple occasions. Enid and him kissed on multiple occasions, even going as far as making out and grinding against each other, but they harbored no feelings towards each other in a romantic capacity. Sexual? Maybe. But he didn't want to waste his first time having sex with a girl that he wouldn't be with. And he still wanted to see what guys were like, once he found some. They lived in a smallish town and he didn't know how to pick up a gay guy. 

Carl himself considered himself straightish, possibly bisexual? Whenever he was attracted to a guy, he was older than Carl. The teen hated this fact about himself. It made him feel like he had daddy issues, which he didn't…at least he doesn't think he does. 

His focus on his comic was pulled away by the variety of voices he heard outside of his window. He recognized his mother's and father's voice, but then there were two that he had never heard before. Carl got up, going to his window and peeking through the blinds. Across the street was a grey haired man with a widow's peak that made Carl crinkle his nose in disgust, not to mention the caterpillar of a mustache that adorned his top lip.

The teen's eyes shifted to the man next to the ugly one and he felt his cheeks grow hot. This man looked like God's gift to Earth. His hair was slicked back neatly and a wife beater fit tight around his torso. He was sweaty from what Carl could tell. He probably worked out.

Carl found himself staring with a goofy smile. Maybe he should have went to meet the new neighbor.

************************************************

That night Enid came by to whisk him away in the night. She was able to sneak them into a bar, which she always managed to do, so it was no surprise. The two loaded up on shots that kept coming their way from creeps that would flirt with Enid. Carl couldn't complain though. The liquor left an awful taste in his mouth, but the silent victory each shot held over his parents washed away any undesirable taste. 

"You have yet to ask me what we are doing at this particular bar on this glorious Friday night. " Enid said enthusiastically. 

"We come here almost every other night, Enid." He quirked a brow at his friend. This, for some reason, earned him a thump on the back of the head. "What the hell?"

"Listen, there's a gang in our boring ass place. I heard they hang out at this bar on Fridays."

"A gang? Why would they move here?"

Enid rolled his eyes, "I mean...I dunno, but anyway, Beth saw them riding motorcycles down the back roads. She said her dad almost called the cops from all the noise they made driving passed their farm."

"So, we're here to see… bikers? " Carl said slowly. This wasn't Enid's dumbest idea, but it wasn't her smartest either. 

She firmly grabbed Carl's shoulders, shaking him, "Hot bikers Carl!"

"Who says they're hot?" Carl put his hands on her arms to stop her dizzying movements. 

"They're bikers, that puts them in the ranks of hotness already."

"Wait… are we talking about like...long bearded bikers? Cause that's…" The teen scrunched up his nose in distaste.

"Oh shut up. You should be happy. Maybe you'll finally get some dick. " She teased, sticking her tongue out.

"Enid, I doubt I'll find a biker interested in me. Underaged me." Carl snorted, glancing towards the door. There was a bit of anticipation building now. He didn't know why, but he wanted to see them. The teen found the concept so interesting. 

Another hour passed and not much happened besides Enid getting tipsy as all hell. She wasn't too drunk because she was still very much coherent. 

Carl sighed and stood up off the barstool, helping his friend by letting her lean on him. By this point she was a giggling mess and whispering filthy things in Carl's ear to get a reaction out of him.

Carl rolled his eyes with a blush covering his face and neck. "Next time I'm stopping you at three drinks."

"Three..s'barely enough to get a buzz." Enid slurred loudly. 

Carl turned to tell her to be quiet, only to walk into someone else. Enid bumped into someone too as a result. 

"Woah kid, you wanna watch where you're going?" Carl heard a voice say above him. He looked up the man's chest, past his leather jacket and his red scarf, to see his neighbor standing before him. He opened his mouth and closed it, not knowing what to say. He could faintly hear Enid slurring out something about the biker's being here.

"Shit kid...you don't look 21 to me, and neither does your babbling broad over here." The man got down in his face and grinned. He was so close that Carl could smell the cologne he wore.

"I-I'm seven…" Carl started, "Seventeen I mean!" He corrected when the man started to laugh. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Why did he tell him his real age? On a side note, the man looked really good. He was in kissing distance...Carl was getting way ahead of himself.

“Look at those pretty fucking eyes. You seein’ This Simon?” Suddenly the ugly man was in Carl’s face and Carl winced.

“I prefer brown eyes. You know that Negan.” Simon shrugged as he pulled back.

Negan? That was a weird name. Fitting though.

“Are you kiddin’ me? He’s got them eyes like that pretty little thing that lives across the street from me.” Negan grinned, “If I were a girl my panties would be soaked from how that country boy was lookin at me.” 

Carl’s face turned red. Was he talking about his dad? The teen clenched his jaw, disappointment filling him at a rapid pace. 

“Rick? The married guy?”

“Rick?” Enid slurred, a grin forming on his face, “Carl, Negan wants to fuck your dad.” She grinned and Carl thought he couldn’t get any redder.

“Shiiiit.” Negan laughed, “I’m sorry, kid. I didn’t mean to say all that shit in front of ya. Hey, don’t tell mommy. I don’t want to feel the wrath of a jealous woman.”

Carl felt jealous and humiliated and he barely even knew the guy for a full day. Imagine the guy you liked having a hard on for your dad. “I-I need to get home.”

“Alright, kid.” Negan moved out of the way, “Tell Daddy Rick I need my pipes looked at, he said he’s pretty handy. I hope he’s handsy too.” 

Carl felt like he could vomit just from Negan’s sense of humor about the situation. This wasn’t funny, this was mortyfying and Negan was being a fucking asshole.

“Whoa, kid-” Negan started as Carl pushed past with Enid in tow. As he pushed through the door, Carl heard Negan chuckle deeply he could practically hear the shit eating grin in his laugh.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“He wants to fuck your dad?” Enid found this hilarious. She was on the floor, holding her stomach as if it were about to bust from laughter. 

“Enid it’s not funny. He’s over there right now.”

“You actually told your dad that Negan needed help with his ‘pipes’”

“No! Fuck no, Enid! Negan came over here and asked early this morning.” 

“Damn, I bet he’s fucking your dad right now.” Enid went over to Carl’s window, peering out at Negan’s house. 

“Enid, stop. I swear I could slap you sometimes.” Carl laid back on his bed, putting his pillow over his head.

“Oh baby, what’s stopping you?” Enid grinned, looking to the other before going to the bed and straddling his hips. “Guess who knows where the saviors hang out.”

“We were already at the bar last night, Enid.”

“I mean where they meet and carry out their evil deeds; they’re a gang after all.”

“What do they do in this hangout?” Carl lifted his pillow to look at her.

"I don't fucking know. That's why tonight we go see." His friend grinned.

An odd feeling settled in Carl's stomach. He knew they shouldn't go. These men could be dangerous, but there was no talking her out of this. She lived for this. Admittedly Carl did too, but that didn't mean he didn't worry sometimes. 

"They won't even see us, Carl. Stop being a little bitch. I can see it in your fucking face that you're trying to talk me out of it." Enid smirked, rolling her hips down against his.

"Enid, the doors open and as much as my mom would love to know that I'm not fully gay, I'm sure she'd hate to see me doing anything remotely sexual." Carl rested his hands on her hips to stop her movements. 

"Boo, you're no fun." Enid teased as she climbed off of him to lay beside him. "Let me dress you up tonight."

"Why? What's the point if no one will see us?" 

"We're going to the bar afterwards, Carl."Enid rolled her eyes. "I want to dress you a little more...like your a badass. I think a badass look would look good on you. Nothing to crazy like but something hot."

The girl hugged him excited so tight Carl though he might explode. 

“Okay, okay...it’s not that exciting.”  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You look hot, Carl. If Negan doesn’t fuck you, I swear I will.” Enid winked.

“Who said I want Negan?” Carl looked down at the combat boots and tight skinny jeans Enid put him in; not to mention the black bomber and white shirt, both of which were quite comfortable. He supposed he did look like a badass.

“Carl, There’s no fucking way that you don’t want Negan. He’s tall and handsome and overall the definition of a badass; he’s the leader of a gang for fucks sake.” Carl was blushing hard, because he did want Negan, The guy was hands down, the most attractive guy on the planet.

“Enid, He’s probably twice my age, and I’m seventeen.”

“Jailbait is hot. Criminals love the shit.”

Carl kept his doubts to himself. The old warehouse was now coming to view. As they approached, a sick feeling settled in his stomach. “No more than five minutes, Enid”

“That’s plenty enough time, babe.” Enid eagerly ran to to an open crack she saw in the door and grinned. “Holy shit.” She whispered quietly as Carl approached. It was then that Enid actually started to look a bit nervous. 

Negan was inside, swinging a barbed wire bat that whipped through the air as if to practice. Carl could tell that the bat swung hard and heavy. His eyes shifted to a man that sat screaming into his gagged mouth. Carl’s eyes opened wide. “Is he gonna…?” Enid promptly shushed him. "Don't shush me, Enid. What the hell did you get me into."

Carl's eyes shifted to the men that surrounded Negan, recognizing one as the ugly man with the fading hairline. Negan was really in a gang wasn't he? Enid didn't just make that up for shits and giggles; this was the real deal.

"Here we gather." Negan paused to swing the bat again, this time with much more force. Everyone in the room was silent; waiting in the man's words. Negan seemed to relish in that fact, letting the silence go on more than necessary. "Wait...Simon, ain't that what you say at a wedding?"

Simon grinned, "Yessir Here we gather in holy matrimony-" Negan interrupted with a thoughtful, "Huh…" followed by another swing of his bat. "Well, Simon. You made me look like an idiot."

"Oh, I'm sorry, next time I'll know what you say before you say it." Simon chuckled.

"That is all I ask. Actually, maybe that would've worked like been ironic or something considered he won't get to marry his hot, very pregnant girlfriend." Negan laughed, leaning back as he did. "I'm so sorry little Asian man. I'm sure you would've been a great father, but not holding up your part of the deal is a no no. A big no no, boy." He walked towards the man in the chair that was squirming and yelling. 

Carl felt his stomach twist uncomfortably as he listened. He hissed Enid's name only to be shushed by the girl in return. The teen lightly tugged at Enid's shoulder and she glared back at him. "Don't be an idiot Carl. This is scare tactics. He's not going to do anything-"

"Well, Enid, it's working and I'm fucking scared." Carl said before looking up in horror. Enid turned to see what Carl was looking at. Negan had the bat raised above his head and smashed it down as hard as he could. The crunch was sickening to listen to as it echoed through the room. 

"Oh shit. Look at your eye. Popped right out of you fucking socket." The man in the chair sputtered incoherently as blood poured from his mouth, staining the cloth that was used as a gag. "What's that? I can't hear ya." Negan leaned in as if to listen before laughing as he pulled back."Oh shit boys, this is too much fun. My pecker would be hard as fuck if I were a sadistic fuck, but I'm not...I'm a reasonable man, with reasonable requests!" He shouted, commanding all the attention away from the disfigured man. Negan gave a sick grin before kicking the man tied to the chair down to the floor. "But do not cross me." He chuckled before swinging his bat down on the man repeatedly until it burst like a watermelon, blood spattering Negan and anyone in range.

"Does that look like fucking scare tactics, Enid." Carl hissed as the room inside the warehouse filled with silence. The girl was in shock, mouth hanging half open, eyes wide. "Enid, let's fucking go. Now!" He pulled her up before they heard footsteps on the gravel. Someone was approaching. "Enid." He whispered softly, tugging her along.

"Hey!" Someone called behind then and it seemed to wake Enid out of her shock because she took off running. "Some kids are out here!" The man yelled, alerting the others. The door slammed open and Negan's silhouette was backlight. Carl couldn't see his face, but he knew Negan wore a sinister grin. It sent chills up his spine just thinking about it. Luckily, it was dark enough that Negan hopefully couldn't tell who he and Enid were. Negan swung his bat up onto his shoulder, blood splattering everywhere in the process. Enid grabbed Carl's hand and took off running. A chorus of voices followed them, yelling and shouting and laughing like maniacs. Carl quickly pulled Enid into the forested area, nearly making her crash into a tree. "Fuck you, Enid for getting me into this!"

"This isn't the time or place to be having this conversation." Enid snapped, "Let's get outta here and then you can yell at me all you want." They ran until the men couldn't hear loud men anymore. They stilled for a moment to listen. There was nothing but the sound of crickets chirping in the night. "Carl, we gotta keep moving." Enid had tears flowing down her face; Carl figured his face resembled hers. 

"I'm going to take you home, okay?" Carl said, trying to seem confident in his voice, but he knew that it fell flat, voice shaking at every other word. No way they could go to the police right? They should but Carl didn't want to. His dad would be eager to be in the case and Carl didn't want that. He watched as Enid nodded and they ran the rest of the way to Enid's house where she begged Carl to stay the night, but he declined. His parents would kill him for being out without permission. They have to sleep on it until the morning. 

Carl made it back home without a problem. He sneaked back into his room and pull off his clothes. His heart beat hammered in his chest as he looked at his closed blind. The teen stood still as he heard a motorcycle pull up across the street. Slowly he made his way over, peeking through the blinds. Negan was just getting off of his bike and walking to his door. The man didn't even spare a glance in the direction of Carl's house; He did however stop for a moment at his front door, as if thinking about something, before heading in.

Carl's heart beat slowed as he relaxed a bit. Maybe he could call in the station and give an anonymous tip in the morning. Yeah. That sounded okay, maybe. There was no way Negan saw who they were. 

With that Carl climbed into bed, falling asleep after tossing and turning most of the night.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Carl woke up to the sound of his dad and a vaguely familiar voice in the kitchen. The teen grabbed his jeans and a shirt, tugging them on tiredly. Carl slowly stepped downstairs, walking into the kitchen. He froze at the sight of the man that sat across from his father. 

“Hey, Carl.” His dad turned to gesture across the table, “This is our neighbor, Negan. Negan, this is my son, Carl.”

Negan grinned, that wolfish, smug grin that made Carl’s stomach filled with butterflies; it also filled him with terror. “Well, hello Carl. It’s nice to meet you.”

“What’re you doing here?” Carl said before thinking and his father gave a disapproving look that told Carl to shut up.

Negan however just laughed, “I get it. All that teenage angst; angry at the world, I’ve been there.” All Carl could imagine was Negan killing that man, swinging the bat down, over and over and over. “I promise I’m not that bad. I even brought over spaghetti to thank your father for helping me with my pipes.” He threw Carl a suggestive wink when Rick wasn’t looking. The teen blushed at the hidden innuendo; almost like an inside joke between Carl and Negan. 

“It was no problem.” Rick looked at the clock and stood, “I’m sorry but I have to get to work.” He said, grabbing his hat off the table and putting it on.

“No problem cowboy.” Negan made it very clear that he was interested as his eyes raked over Rick slowly. Carl and Negan both watched the blush that filled Rick’s cheek; he was more than a little flustered. Carl was both jealous and unsettled. “Oh, blue eyes, I forgot, you left your wrench in my bathroom. Must’ve been distracted on your way out.” Negan chuckled, causing Rick to blush even more. “I know you have to leave; maybe Carl can come over, grab it and return it to your tool box?”

“What, hell no!” Carl said, shaking his head, “Dad don’t-”

“Carl, stop being rude. Just go over and grab it for me, and it’ll take no more than five minutes.” Rick grabbed his keys, “Nice to see you again, Negan. And thanks for the spaghetti.” He then walked out of the kitchen, leaving Carl and Negan alone.

There was silence for a long moment as Negan looked him over before settling on his face. “Damn, you really do get those sweet blue eyes from your daddy. I could get lost in those eyes forever. Your mama is a lucky woman.” He said, smirking as he brushed passed Carl. The teen stood there in the kitchen, clenching his teeth. He was partly mad at himself for being attracted to this murderer, but also the fake that this man was severely attracted to his father. “Carl.” Negan called in a sing song voice, “Are you coming?” 

Carl followed, slipping on his shoes at the door. Negan led the way across the street. Carl felt like he was entering the lion’s den. He was prey and the older man most certainly was the predator. When they reached the front door, Carl waited by the door. “I’ll wait here and you can bring it down.” He mumbled.

“Like hell you are.” Negan’s voice was low and intimidating as he dropped his friendly neighbor act. The teen visibly shuddered slightly and he looked at Negan. He wanted to stand his ground on the matter, but Negan’s stare slowly became more and more intimidating. He was actively trying to scare Carl with just a look. It worked because Carl found himself walking inside, hanging his head down low. He froze when Negan clapped a hand onto his shoulder, “Atta boy.” Negan said in his friendly neighborly voice. “How hard was that?” He asked in a whisper as he leaned down close to Carl’s ear, feeling the older man press against his back. This was anything but friendly, it was borderline seductive. Carl’s breath hitched as he closed his eyes. “Come on upstairs, baby blue eyes.” He said, walking upstairs.

Carl followed hesitantly. Negan couldn’t do anything to him now, right? His dad knew the last known place he was with Negan. No way. Did Negan even know it was him and Enid last night? Carl wasn’t paying attention and bumped into Negan’s back and ended up falling backwards. The older turned around and laughed, “Them blue eyes not working correctly?” Negan turned and reached out a hand to Carl. The younger stared up at the older who wore a sick grin. Carl looked at the hand that presented such a kind gesture, unlike last night when it took a human life. Carl reluctantly took that hand and Negan pulled him in close, pressing the teen’s body into his own with one tug. “You seem nervous, boy.” Negan leaned down so close that Negan’s beard brushed against his smooth face. He whispered into Carl’s ear, “Do I scare you? I promise I don’t bite baby blue eyes.”

Carl’s face was on fire. He felt like he could burst into flames right then and there with how much heat he was generating. Negan did things to his body that shouldn’t be happening. He admittedly wanted Negan to bite him, to whisper intimidating things like that to him. He had never been more sexually attracted, and scared, of someone in his whole life.

Negan chuckled softly as he pulled away and disappeared into the bathroom. He came back and presented the wrench to Carl.

“Thanks, I’ll see myself out.” He reached for the wrench and Negan grabbed his wrist, tightening his grip as the teen tried to pull away.

“You gotta a crush on me don’t you?” Negan said, “Is that why you blush so much around me? And you look hella jealous when I flirt with your sweet daddy.” He stopped Carl when the teen was about to speak. “Don’t even try to deny it baby boy. I can practically feel the raging hormones being thrown at me. Is your crush the reason why you,” Negan used his other hand to lift Carl’s chin to look at him. “Followed me and my boys up to the warehouse?” Carl tried looked away, but Negan held his chin in place. “What’s fucked up is that you saw me turn someone's head to a red slushie, and you still want me to slide my prick into your sweet little throat, don’t you?” Yes. Carl watched as Negan leveled with him, his face so close that Carl wanted to lean forward and kiss the older's lips.

Carl closed his eyes, “I won’t tell. Please, I swear I won’t.” He said, “I fucking won’t say a word.”

“I know you won’t, jailbait.” Negan grinned, “Because even if I get caught, I have men who will avenge the fuck outta me, boy.” He let go of Carl’s face. “And as much as I’d hate to see daddy Rick’s head get bashed in, I’ll have to tell them to do it. And they will. They’ll leave you alive; let you wallow in the fact that you caused that. I warned you, boy. And this is your only warning.” 

Tears filled the corner of Carl’s eyes and Negan wiped a few as they dropped, “Send the message to your little girlfriend.” With that he moved away from Carl, leading the way back downstairs. As Carl stepped through the door, Negan grabbed his wrist once more. “We can be good neighbors to each other, Carl. I have no ill will. As you heard me say, I’m a reasonable man.” He let go of Carl’s wrist before disappearing into his house, slamming the door, leaving Carl to stand there. He was a bit shaken and embarrassed. There was no other option but to comply with Negan’s wishes.

Carl walked quickly across the street, slamming the front door. He pressed his back against it before he slid down to the ground. “Fuck…” He said tossing the wrench aside. He definitely was up shits creek. He couldn’t help how his face burned though when he thought about Negan being so close. ‘You still want me to slide my prick into your sweet little throat, don’t you?’  
He cock twitched at just hearing that statement in person, but now it did again as he thought about it. He bit his lip, leaning his head against the door as he closed his eyes. He had a huge crush on the fucking murderer that lived across the street.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later in the day, after getting off the phone with Enid, he took a much needed nap. He woke up three hours later when his dad called him down to eat. His mother was already in the kitchen, warming up the spaghetti. The teen sat at the table, looking to his dad. "How was work?" He asked, not really interested, but the silence was killing him. He needed something to fill his mind. 

"Fine. Kind of busy. What'd you do all day? Sleep?" Rick teased as Lori approached with plates for Rick and Carl. 

"It was so nice of Negan to make us this." She said, but it really didn't sound like she was too excited about it. Maybe she knew that Negan wanted to fuck her husband. It seemed like the man didn't care who knew about his attraction towards Rick. "You two seem to be getting along."

"Lori, I fixed his pipes. I hardly think that's enough to make us friends." Rick said. Carl still hates that word. Pipes. It had such a negative connotation to him now. He watched as his dad dug into the spaghetti, humming in satisfaction. Carl looked to his own plate, Envisioning last night when Negan bashed a man's skull into something unrecognizable. It reminded him of the saucy spaghetti that was in front of him. How was he supposed to live with himself knowing that Negan was a cold blooded murderer. 

"I didn't say friends…he just seems to like you. I think he's gay. The way he looks at you-" Lori frowned as Rick interrupted her.

"Lori, you're being paranoid. And even if he was attracted to me, you know I'm not gay." Rick said.

"You certainly blush like you like it. You don't even blush like that around me." Lori mumbled, jabbing her fork into her spaghetti. 

"Jesus Lori, do you really want to start this right now? Do you?" Rick raised his voice, "You have no reason to be jealous."

Carl reluctantly ate the spaghetti as he listened to his parents argue. This was a routine he was used too. He was sure they hated each other by now. Most nights they wouldn't even sleep in the same room.

"I just...tell him you're not interested." Lori said, "That's all I'm asking."

"Yeah, fine." Rick brushed it off with a sigh.

"Anyway, I have some news…" Lori seemed to perk up a bit. "I think I'm pregnant." She said, looking at Rick with a small smiled.

Carl gave a confused look to his mother. She seemed a bit uneasy.

Rick smiled, "Really? That's great news. Have you taken a test?" Lori nodded slightly. "I'll take you to the doctor in the morning." Rick reached for her hand, kissing the back of it. 

Carl gave a small smile. Maybe this was the thing that would keep his parents together. He always thought that they were on the edge of divorce. This was good news after having a shitty day. 

-

It'd been a week since Enid and Carl witnessed Negan commit murder and they were still shaken up about it. Enid wasn't her usual self. Parties, drinking and sex didn't seem to interest her. Her mind was clearly clouded with images of Negan's bat connecting with that man's head. Carl often woke up with night terrors now, yelling and jumping up out of bed sweating. His dad heard him a few times, rushing into Carl's room. He assured him that everything was fine. It wasn't though, him and Enid shouldn't have to live in constant fear of Negan. What if the man just decided one day just to off their families? 

Carl walked home alone. Enid claimed she was too tired, but Carl knew she just couldn't bare being near Negan's house. Carl himself even hated that place. 

As he walked to his front door, he heard his mother in the kitchen washing dishes. "Hey, mom. How'd the doctor's appointment go?" He leaned against the wall.

Lori turned, smiling brightly. "Oh, it went well. I just hope I get a beautiful baby girl. I've always wanted a girl."

"I'm sure you'll get your wish." Carl smiled back, genuinely happy. 

"Oh, Carl." He watched her dry off the dish that the spaghetti was in. "Be a doll and take this over to Negan." What's with his parents and sending him over there? She saw the hesitation in Carl's eyes, "Please it'll only take about five minutes." Five minutes, was that the standard time adults like to spew to their kids?

Carl sighed, taking the dish. "I'll be right back." He exited back through the door that he had just come through and looked across the street. Back to the lion's den he went. He crossed the street without looking, hoping that he'd get hit by a car, but he had no luck. The teen walked up the driveway, making his way to the path that lead to Negan's door. Carl rang the bell, his hand trembling as here did. He was terrified. Who in their right mind wouldn't be? 

After a moment the door flung open and a very shirtless Negan greeted him. Carl's eyes traveled down his chest, making his way down his defined abs before they followed the distinct V-line. "Should I say something cliche like If you take a picture it'll last longer." Carl quickly looked up to his face, a furious blush covered his own. "Damn, baby blue eyes, you get that blush from your daddy. How's my Rick doing by the way?" He grinned, Negan could feel the envy radiating off of the teen.

"He's not your Rick, and he's fine. He's having another kid with his wife that he loves very much." Carl clenched his jaw, holding the dish out for Negan.

"I'm okay with being his Monica Lewinsky." Negan grinned as he took the dish.

Carl gave a confused look, "What the hell does that even mean?"

"It means, I'll be his side piece, just like Monica Lewinsky was Bill's side piece. "

Carl frowned, starting to walk away. 

“Hey, it’s rude to walk away in the middle of a conversation.” Negan stepped forward, pressing himself against Carl’s back. “I already told you that I’m not going to hurt you unless I absolutely have to, didn't I?” Carl shivered as Negan’s hand traveled up the back of his neck and into his hair, raking through his long locks slowly. “You know,” He leaned down and whispered into Carl’s ear. “If I were to get you on all fours and slide into you from behind.” He pressed against Carl a bit more. “You would look just like a girl. I could tug on these long locks of yours and get a good grip.” The older yanked Carl’s head backwards and Carl gasped, looking up at Negan. He felt lust swell up inside of him and he knew his eyes showed it. Negan watched Carl’s adam's apple bob as the teen swallowed thickly. Negan wasn’t hard by any means, but he knew Carl could still feel him through the thin material of his sweatpants. “You want me so bad don’t you? This is so cute. You are adorable, but you realize how fucked up you are? I ended someone’s life a week ago. And you’d still let me dick you down, wouldn’t you?” He chuckled before releasing Carl.

The teen tugged his shirt down, ashamed of how hard and turned on he was. “You don’t have to keep reminding me, ya know.”

“What? That you want me to fuck you into my mattress? Or that you watched me turn someone’s head into a bloody pulp.” Negan looked to Carl’s crotch and chuckled in amusement. “Teenage boys get so fuckin’ hard at the littlest things.”

“Fuck you.” Carl said as he walked away, making sure he was adequately covered.

“Thanks for returning my dish. I appreciate it Carl.” Negan shouted across the street before going inside of his house.

Carl stood outside his front door, willing away his boner. His mother couldn’t see that he was hard. Many questions would arise, probably none that she’d ask outloud, but it was embarrassing nonetheless. Plus, she wasn’t dumb, she could probably piece together that it was something to do with Negan seeing as he just came from over there.

He took a deep breath as he calmed down a bit and stepped into the house. He hurriedly ran up the stairs, even though his mother called to him. The teen murmured something about the bathroom and retreated into his room. “Fuck. What the fuck is wrong with me.” He groaned, falling onto his bed. 

Later in the night Carl sent his time reading comics. His mother had left for some bookclub meeting or something. So it was one of those nights where his dad ordered in. Carl perked up however when a pleasant smell wafted into his room. He knew his father couldn’t cook to save his life, so when he heard the shuffle of pots and pans he was confused. The teen threw his comic aside and headed down the steps only to see Negan standing over their stove whistled to himself. He wore his mother’s apron and it fit snug around his body.

“Hey, Carl.” Negan grinned at the teen, loving the shocked expression on his face. “Your daddy told me the wife would be out tonight, so I pounced on him. I mean the idea of cooking for him. A hot meal is the best way to a man’s heart.”

“My father isn’t gay if you hadnn’t noticed.” Carl said, chewing the inside of his cheek. This man knew just what to say to piss him off.

“Everyone is a little gay, whether they know it or not. And your daddy is a sweet little bottom waiting for his top.” Negan laughed, “Mmm, I get hard just thinking about it Carl, kind of like how you get hard for me.”

“Is it your mission in life to piss me off?”

“No, but you should make it your mission in life not to piss me off.” Negan said in a serious tone. The way he could change his voice from friendly to intimidating in a matter of seconds scared Carl.

“Is...Nevermind…”

“Is what Carl?” Negan turned to look at the teen, raising his brows.

“That guy you killed.” Carl said quietly, “Did he piss you off?”

Negan took slow and deliberate steps towards Carl before they heard footsteps down the hall. The older stopped in his tracks and smiled as Rick came into view, “Alright, I’ll be right back.”

“Dad, where are you going?” Carl frowned, “You’re leaving a stranger alone in our house.”

“Carl, he’s our neighbor. Besides, you’re here.” Rick said.

“I can go get the beers Rick. I’d hate for Carl to feel unsafe with me around.” Negan smiled kindly before he removed his apron.

“No, no. Really, I’ll go and get it. I couldn’t cook whatever it is you’re making to save my life.” Rick shook his head and grabbed his keys off the rack. “I’ll be no more than-”

“Five minutes?” Carl rolled his eyes as he watched his dad throw him a glare. 

“You be safe out there ranger Rick. I need all of you back here in one piece so you can enjoy my meat.” Negan licked his lips as he looked over Rick. The man blushed and nodded slightly before he left.

Carl felt like he could punch that smug smile off of Negan’s face. “Are you flirting with him just to taunt me?” His fingernails dug into his palms as he clenched his fists.

“I’m doing it,” Negan finally moved close to Carl like he had wanted to before, “because I wanted to bury my prick so far inside Rick that I’d have him seeing stars. Something that wife of his could never give him. I’d pound that sweet little bundle of nerves until he was begging me for more.” Negan chuckled at the face of disgust that settled on Carl’s face. “Don’t get me wrong, you are a cutie Carl. But right now I have a lust for daddy Rick. Maybe when I’m done with him, I’ll move onto you, literally.” He chuckled darkly before he put Carl’s mom’s apron back on. He took his position back over the stove, whistled once more as if nothing had happened.

"How can you be so casual about this? About me and Enid knowing…" Carl said, "Why don't you just kill us?"

Negan chuckled darkly, not facing Carl as he spoke. "I scared the piss outta you that night didn't I?" He paused for a second. "And you love your parents and you wouldn't let anything happen to them. I trust that you will keep me and my men from busting their heads open like a fucking pinata. It's the way it is, and you'll just have to live with that." Negan said with a taunting voice, "Congrats on your new sibling by the way. I can't wait to meet them." He finally turned around, a huge grin on his face. 

By the time Rick came back, Negan was all done. He made everyone's plates before sitting down. Carl watched his dad hand Negan an ice cold beer and the other man gladly accepts. "None for your son?" Negan grinned, "He looks like he can handle a drink or two. You ever drink before Carl?"

"He's only Seventeen, Negan. And he wouldn't drink." Rick dismissed the idea. Carl's mind flashes back to the first night he'd met Negan and the bar. The teen squirmed nervously, looking down at his food. 

"Aw, come on. It's boys night. Just a sip." Negan open his beer and slid it over to Carl but Rick intercepted it, sliding is back to Negan. 

"I said no." Rick looked mildly annoyed at the man. 

"Technically you didn't say anything that sounded like no, baby." Negan hummed, "But I am sorry for overstepping, you know I don't mean any harm." He rests his hand on Rick's shoulder, squeezing it gently. 

"I told you to stop calling me that." Rick said, looking Negan in the eyes as he brushed the older man's hand off his shoulder. 

"Oh fuck, I'm sorry. I get so in my head that I tend to call the pretty ones baby." Negan chuckled at the red tinted on Rick's cheeks.

Carl gritted his teeth and the display that was unfolding in front of him. He hated this. He hated Negan. Why would his dad giving this man so much leeway. Yes Negan was hot as fuck, but his dad didn't like guys and on top of that he's married to a loving pregnant wife.

"Wow, this steak tastes good." Rick said, humming thoughtfully.

"Why thank you. I knew you'd enjoy having my meat in your mouth, blue eyes. " Negan stuck a piece of meat into his mouth as he looked at Carl. His gaze darkened as he continued to stare at the teen. Carl could see something flicker in those brown eyes. He wasn't sure what. But it sent a chill up his spine. Negan's eyes shifted down to Carl's untouched plate as he swallowed. "You not hungry Carl? My cooking not good?" He leaned forward, placing his crossed arms on the table. 

This caught Rick's attention, "Don't get offended, Carl is just an extremely picky eater." He said, looking to his son who was intently staring back a Negan. "What's going on here? Something happen while I was gone?" He was concerned, regretting leaving Carl alone with this man. What did he do to upset Carl.

"Oh, I have this ping pong tables set up in my basement. I bet Carl $50 he couldn't beat me. He's been in competitive mood ever since. If looks could kill, I'd be a dead man. I told him that I'm not the enemy, not yet anyway. But just you wait, ima get my hands around that handle and swing as hard as I can, nothing can stop me." He grinned "I talk a lot of shit, but I can sure as shit can fucking back it up."

Carl gulped and averted his gaze downward. Rick looked to Negan, "You do a whole lot of swearing. Not sure I want my son to be around you and pick up bad habits."

"How about I give you a few bad habits instead?" Negan caught his bottom lip between his teeth as he looked at Rick's flustered face. He was about to say something, probably to scold Negan's flirting, but the older quickly interrupted. "My sweet tooth is a helluva bad habit, so I thought I might share it. I have two cheesecakes in my fridge and one has your name on it Mr. Grimes."

Carl stabbed into the meat, eating it aggressively. Never in his life did he think he would be jealous of his dad. The teen wanted someone to pay attention to him just the way Negan did to his dad. Maybe that's why Rick let the flirting continue. It probably felt nice to have all of that praise being thrown your way. Lori surely didn't give Rick any praise. She hardly even flirting back, resorting to complaining about everything Rick did. That until she got pregnant, now she almost a joy to be around. Still, she didn't give out compliments to Rick like this. Rick half heartedly scolded Negan about the flirting all throughout dinner, but it didn't stop, and clearly he didn't want it too.

Carl stayed silent, looking up at the murderer who occasionally looked back with a knowing grin. 

\-----

Over the next month Negan was a frequent presence in his house, especially after Shane was thrown into the mix. This "boys night", as Negan so affectionately called it, happened mostly during Lori's book club. This also was a period of time when Negan's flirting was nearly non existent. Carl chalked it down to Shane being there. However the flirting he did slip in seemed more direct and vulgar. It had no secret innuendoes that could be interpreted differently. His dad usually just elbowed Negan and roll his eyes. 

In this time Enid made frequent appearances at his house, most of the time on "boys night". She was more shaken up after the murder they witnessed five weeks ago than he was. The teen wouldn't even cast a glance at the house across the street as if it were a monster that would snatch her up if she dared to look at it.

"Enid? Come on this homework is due tomorrow." Carl lightly shoved her. She was quiet all night. 

"How can you be so okay with this? He's in your house constantly, trying to fuck dad and… and standing in your kitchen cooking you dinner like he's your third fucking Parent, Carl. He threatened our fucking lives! What about that do you not understand?" Enid was yelling now, loud enough that Rick heard and called up to make sure they were okay. 

Carl ignored this and instead he said, "Are you fucking kidding? What do you want me to fucking do, Enid? Go back in time and make you not take me to the fucking warehouse?" Carl hissed, "I can't change this."

"You can stop your dick from getting hard everytime he casts a glance in your direction." Enid stood grabbing her things and headed towards the door. "Fuck you. Carl." She said as she opened the door only to be greeted with Rick. The teen looked at him in surprise before casting an embarrassed glance downward. She muttered something about going home and Rick looked to Carl for a moment. 

"Okay let me drive you home. It's getting late." Enid nodded weakly before heading down the stairs with Rick.

Carl waited til they left before he headed downstairs where Shane was drunk, passed out on the couch and Negan was half asleep watching some reality TV show. For a second Negan actually looked normal sitting there, giggling sleepily at the woman yelling on the screen. Carl wondered what lead Negan to live the life that he did. The teen stared at him for a moment before the front door opened. Carl's mom raises a brow at him as she closes the door behind her.

"Hey sweetie. Where's Enid, she went home already?" She asked before seeing that Negan was still her. There was a soft scowl that adorned her face. If you blinked you might've missed it.

"Um, yeah." Carl looked to Negan as well, for a completely different reason than Lori was. "She was tired…" He said half-heartedly. 

"He's always here. I don't know what Rick sees in him. He's loud, rude, a potty mouth." Lori shook her head, "And he flirts with Rick when I'm not around, and when I am."

And he's a psychopathic murderer. Carl thought to himself. He felt sick to his stomach as he remembered this fact. The teen could take one look at those dimples and forget anything the man has ever done that he's hated. It was borderline obsessive. Regardless, remembering that Negan called him cute made his cheeks flush with the deepest red they possibly could. He loved it. Carl loved the thought of the man touching him and talking dirty to him and pinning him down-

"Carl? Carl, are you listening?" Lori interrupted his train of thought. "Honey are you feeling alright? You cheeks are red. Are you sick?" She reached out a hand, touching the boy's forehead.

"Y-yeah. I'm fine mom. I just um...yeah, im fine." The teen assured, sighing softly.

It was then that Negan stood up, a bit wobbly on his feet. "Hey, Mrs. Grimes. Don't you look pregnanter. That's the cutest lil bump I've ever seen." Lori pulled her coat more over her belly as if Negan could hurt it in some way. 

"I'm going to bed." Lori said before quickly retreating to the bedroom.

"That one is a feisty one. I can see why Rick likes her. Brown eyes and brunettes really are his type, huh?" Negan grinned, carefully making his way over to Carl. The teen clenched his fists, tensing a bit when the larger man stood in front of him. "Hey baby blue eyes." He slurred; Carl could smell the alcohol on his breath. "I'm really fucking drunk. You needa walk me home."

"Negan, you live across the street." Carl rolled his eyes, crossing his arms. "You can-"

"I don't wanna get hit by a car while I'm crossin' the street." He hummed, putting an arm around Carl's shoulders. He lead the way to the door, clumsily trying to unlock it. Carl watched, amused before helping the older. 

They slowly made their way to Negan's house, pausing every time Negan lost his balance, which was a lot. Carl was ready to leave the older before he was pulled back against Negan's chest. "Not gonna come inside and undress me and tuck me into bed?" 

Negan breathed down Carl's neck making him shiver in delight. The hands that ran up and down his sides made him melt into Negan's touch. He wanted those hands all over him. "Okay. " Carl breathed, leaning his head back to look up at Negan. He desperately wanted to kiss those lips. To feel that beard scratch against his face. He wanted all of it. Carl knew it was pathetic. 

Negan led him up the stairs and to his room. Negan's room was surprisingly neat and organized. Carl shivered as his eyes fell onto the bat lying in the corner; cleaned and looking almost brand new. He glanced over to Negan who was already shirtless, his leather jacket and t-shirt discarded on the floor. He was know fumbling with the button on his pants, muttering soft curses under his breath. 

"Carl. Help me." Negan sighed. 

Carl sighed, brushing away Negan's drunk hands and unbuttoned the button for the grown man.

"Pull them down for me, baby boy." Negan hummed, looking down at the teen. "I can't balance for shit." 

Carl complied, bending down to tug the pants off, all the while Negan used him for balance. He pulled his legs through and Carl pulled off the pants and throwing them in a random direction. 

"Aren't you lucky this wasn't a no underwear day." He grinned as Carl stood back up. "You would've had a brief meeting with my prick." He watched Carl's eyes slid down to the front of his boxer briefs. They fit tight around him, leaving little to the imagination. "Pretty big, huh?" Negan ran his hand between his legs, grabbing his dick through the thin material and giving it a squeeze. 

Carl watched intently, ashamed of himself. "I don't have much to compare it to." He looked away and his eyes landed back on the bat that laid casually in the corner, the murder weapon. 

"Ain't she pretty? I have to admit, I didn't think you'd be more interested in her than my big prick, Carl." Negan sat on his bed, grinning, "Does she scare you? Make you wanna piss your fucking pants?"

"Only if it's in your hands." Carl admitted. 

"Pretty baby, don't be scared of me." Negan said, pulling the other closer, opening his legs so that Carl stood between them. "How many times do I have to tell you that I'm a good guy?"

"You don't seem like a good guy." Carl frowned, looking down at the bulge that filled Negan's underwear. Why'd he wear them so tight? And is he hard, or is his dick really that big when it was soft?

"You wanna touch it?" The older purred, breaking the short moment of silence. "You wanna touch it, baby boy?" He repeated, though it came off as more of a statement the second time. "I want you to. Give it a good little squeeze for me."

"Stop it." Carl said angrily, "You don't get to threaten me and flirt with my dad and flirt with me! It doesn't work like that! You're fucked up you asshole!" Carl tried to move from between the man's legs but Negan held him in place. The teen gulped when he saw these serious look on Negan's face. 

"Baby blue eyes, are you absolutely sure that's the way you want to talk to me?" Negan asked in a low tone but a playful grin played on his face after a moment, "Because I sure as shit don't like the way you're talkin' to me."

"Fuck off. You-" The man suddenly grabbed Carl's face, bringing it down to his level. He shut his eyes, afraid of what was to come. 

"I like you Carl. Does it get heavy?" Negan asked vaguely. Carl gave him a confused look. "Ya know, carrying those big, huge balls of yours around." 

Carl sneered, yanking himself away from Negan's grasp, "Why can't you leave me alone? I already told you I won't fucking tell!"

"Woo! Baby boy, you get that blush from your daddy, but you get that fiery feistiness from your mama." Negan chuckled, "Meet me at the warehouse at 11pm. And let's skip these threats, pretend you already know what's going to happen if you don't show up." Negan moved to settle into bed, pulling the covers over himself. "C'mere, lemme give you a goodnight kiss." 

Carl clenched his jaw, but still approached. He leaned down a bit, blushing already, partly from his angry outburst. He watched Negan press two fingers to his lips, kissing them before placing the on Carl's lips. "Goodnight, baby boy. Think of me when you have your dick in your hand tonight." He said in a way that made Carl's dick twitch with excitement. Negan dipped his fingers into Carl's mouth. The teen was somewhere in between biting them and sucking on them, savoring the taste of the older man's intruding fingers. All too soon, the fingers left his mouth, "Go run home now, you have a long night ahead of you tomorrow."

Carl frowned, feeling defeated. He supposed as long as Negan lived across the street he'd always be defeated. Negan always won; he would win. The teen headed down the stairs and out of the house.

Carl didn't go to sleep thinking of Negan in a sexual way, but rather, what was going to happen at the old warehouse tomorrow night. How could he sleep tonight? Negan probably did this on purpose, to keep Carl thinking about him. To be afraid all night and morning.

It worked like a charm.

The next morning came all too quickly. He was already dressed and ready for who knows what. It was nerve racking. He wanted to forget all about tonight but he just couldn't. Negan was probably going to kill him. 

The teen stood, looking out of the window at Negan's house. Now he felt the intimidation that Enid was feeling before. Carl didn't want to feel this way. He stood, pushing the feelings back down. He couldn't let Negan see that he was afraid anymore; it gave the man too much power over him. 

Carl went about his day as normally as he could. Negan didn't even show up to flirt with his dad. In fact, it didn't even look like Negan was home. Neither his car or his motorcycle were in the driveway. How were they both gone?

"A quiet, Neganless house." Lori walked by his door, "Isn't it great, Carl?" She called as she made her way downstairs. 

Carl wasn't sure if it was a good thing. What was Negan doing when he wasn't being watched? He could be up to anything. Part of Carl would rather him be in the house where he can be seen at all times. Not because he was attracted to him, in fact, Carl felt his attraction to Negan slowly declining. At least he thinks it is. 

By the time night rolled around Carl was sneaking out of his room and to the old warehouse. There was a slew of motorcycles parked out back. He also spotted Negan's motorcycle and car. He saw that the opening that he and Enid had peeped through before was closed off. He had no way of knowing what exactly was on the other side of this warehouse door. 

He knocked twice and the door swung open. Negan greeted him with a sly grin. "Baby boy! I didn't think you'd make it." He said, moving aside for Carl to enter. The older man threw an arm around Carl's shoulders, leading the way. "We decided to do this further back in the warehouse. Last time we just got a little too excited about the new place." He said. 

"What are you talking ab-" Carl stopped talking as Negan opened the door to reveal a man tied to a similar chair the guy before was in. He had bright red hair and a glare that could kill. "Are you…y-you're gonna…"

"Kill him?" Negan laughed as one of his men handed him the baseball bat. "You like Lucille?" Negan pointed the bat at Carl, causing him to flinch. "I saw you eyeing her when you came into my room baby blue eyes. She's real pretty and likes attention." Carl felt the bat press harder into his face. The barbed wire dug deep into his skin as Negan dragged it along his cheek. He felt blood trickle down his face, sliding down his neck. Negan then turned the bat so Carl could grab the handle.

"I brought you here to kill him."


	2. Our Secret- Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm shaky on Georgia law, and law in general. I've been listening to this podcast that's very informative though. I want to be accurate as a lowly scrub like myself can be.
> 
> Also, trying to perfect my Negan. I thought maybe I was making him too comical, then I obsessively watched clips with Negan in them then I wondered if he was comical enough. 
> 
> Sidenote: Fuck Negan is hot. Omfg.

"If you don't kill him, I'm going to take you home and let you explain to sweet little Rick why im going to bash his fucking brains out." 

Carl gulped so hard it seemed like it audible throughout the entirety of the warehouse. His ears were ringing as he reached for the bat. "Please don't make me do this." Tears poured down Carl's face as he tried to prevent himself from sobbing. Ultimately he failed and he saw some of Negan's men chuckled at his expense. His hands trembled around the bat, nearly dropping it as the older man approached. 

He stood close, wiping away the blood mixed tears from his cheek. Negan lightly pinched Carl's cheeks in a way that vaguely reminds him of how his grandmother used to. "Baby boy, don't cry. Just gotta have some leverage here. I can't just believe you won't tell, I need the stakes to be higher for you. Some real fucking incentive for you not to tell."

Carl pulled himself away from Negan and looked to the ginger haired man that was bound to the chair. His jaw was tight and his glare never fading. "Who is he? What did he do?" The teen's voice trembled as he spoke.

"You wanna sit around making fucking friendship bracelets with him kid?" Negan chuckled softly as he leaned to the side, one of his signature moves Carl noticed. "Do it." He still held a smirk on his features but it was accompanied by a serious sinister tone. The older got down in Carl's face. "Are you fucking deaf? Don't embarrass me in front of my fucking men, Carl. I told them you were the teen with the big swinging dick and huge beach ball sized nuts. I told them that you were untapped potential. Don't fucking embarrass me in front of my fucking friends." 

As Negan stood up straight and backed away, Carl raised the bat, taking a swing at Negan's head. Negan however, saw this coming and was quick to dodge the attack. "Woo, look at those beach ball sized nuts in action!" 

Carl back away, clutching the bat tight to himself. He continued to move back until he hit something solid. Carl looked up to see Simon and before the teen knew it the bat was taken from his grasp. Simon grinned as he handed it over to Negan before he backed away. Carl cried out as Negan poked his chest roughly with the bat. He jabbed hard a few times before the teen fell back onto the ground. 

"Don't be a fucking pussy now Carl. You are a badass in the fucking making! Don't be afraid of little old me." Carl flinched as Negan took a swing towards him in an attempt to scare him. "Get the fuck up and finish this sack of shit off before I knock the head off your shoulders and watch it sail across this fucking room." The teen stood after that.

Negan grabbed the back of Carl's neck, forcing him back over to the glaring man in the chair. He squeezed hard on the back of Carl's neck and leaned down to talk into his ear. Carl shivered lightly in his grasp even though he tried his hardest not to. "You wanna know what this man did?" He chuckled, dragging his next words out. "Absolutely nothing." His breath was hot on Carl's neck. "Some fucking beef headed, militant dick. Don't get me wrong, I support the fuck outta that. " Negan chuckled, moving from Carl. "He loves violence, kid." Negan looked to the ginger before laughing. 

How could Carl do this? The fact that this man was innocent of any real crime made it worse. "Negan…please…" He hated how whiny he sounded. He hated how that made the men around him laugh more. Carl searched Negan's eyes for sympathy but he found none. There was just a cold, hard stare, the true look of a psychopath. "Please, I'll do anything else. Anything you want."

Negan leaned back, another signature move Carl realized, swaying slightly. "You know what, I'm feeling really fucking generous." A grin spread across his face. "You take the first swing, make it real hard for me, and I'll finish the rest. Just know that this makes you a pussy. Might as well start meowing now cause your big balls just got clipped off." He laughed making a scissor motion with his fingers. "It's smooth fucking sailing down there ain't it? I bet-"

Carl clenched his jaw as his grip on the bat tightened. He ran at Negan raising the bat and Negan caught it as Carl brought it down in one hard swing. The older hissed, holding up his other hand to stop his men from interrupting. Blood trickled down Negan's arm as the barbed wire dug into his palm. The man's pinkie finger looked like it was rendered useless as it caught a significant amount of the blow. Carl watched as Negan's grip tightened around the barbed wire end. Blood dripped onto the floor in slow falling droplets. 

"I think that you think that I thought that you wouldn't try that again." He brows raised. "You think I'm afraid of a little pain, baby blue eyes?"

Carl felt sick watching Negan's hands slide down the sharp barbed wire. 

"This is your last warning." Negan said, pulling his mangled hand away from the bat. He didn't seem concerned about it. Not even relatively fazed by it; he was amused, he was always amused.

Carl sighed deeply, looking to the man. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He said, walking to the man. He raised the bat, bringing it down hard in the center of the man's head. He dropped the bat before a kick was delivered to the center of his chest by the now injured, bloodied man. The kick was weak, but it was enough to send Carl backwards, stumbling over straight onto his ass. 

"Who the fuck didn't tie his legs down? He kicked my boy." He sounded slightly angry about it. "And fuck you you dick for dropping my baby girl." He said, leaning down to Carl's level, "Pick her the fuck up and hand her to me." 

Carl felt empty, his ears were ringing off the hook. He just contributed to a man's death. Negan's words fell into deaf ears because Carl was frozen in place. He didn't even have a reaction when Negan pushed him in anger and he was now laying on his back. 

"I have to do everything myself around here." He muttered, picking up Lucille, his girl, and throwing her over his shoulder. 

Carl flinched as he heard the bat whip the air, followed by it collided with the man's skull. Carl couldn't see what exactly was happening from his position on his back, for that he was glad. The moment of relief didn't last long. Negan kicked the man down, the chair and the man crash down to the ground right in front of Carl. 

"This red'll compliment your blue eyes." Negan laughed, raising his bat high above his head.

"It's orange." Simon interrupted.

Negan looked at Simon, confused, "What?"

"Orange. It's the complementary color for blue." Simon said, "Not red."

Negan lowered the bat, using it to rest his weight on. "No dipshit, I depends on the shade. Lighter blue goes with red."

"No it doesn't." The other man scoffed.

"What the fuck Simon, did you fail fucking preschool?" Negan scoffed as the other men in the room laughed. "Dwight? Where's that half faced mother fucker?" Negan looked around the room before a man stepped out, half of his face was severely scarred. "Get your fucking phone out and tell Simon he's a fucking idiot."

Were they really arguing over this when there was a half dead guy twitching on the ground in front of them? Carl listened to this happen as his clenched his eyes shut tight. He tried to calm down. The teen's heart was hammering so loud he thought he might die.

"See you fucking idiot, that's red."

Carl clenched his eyes tighter when he felt footsteps approach him. 

"Kid, open your eyes, let me prove a fucking point."

Carl reluctantly did staring up at the two men, flinching when Negan set the phone near his face. 

"You're fucking blind, Negan." He said pointing something out on the phone.

Were they looking at a fucking color wheel? What the actual fuck.

Negan squinted, "Fuck you I'm right." He threw the phone at Simon and it clattered to the ground.

Carl wondered if this Dwight guy minded, or was everyone used to Negan treating them like shit? He desperately wished that he was home right now, or at Enid's house or even at the bar. Anywhere but here. 

"Now you took the fun outta this shit." Negan complained as he assumed his previous position. 

Carl couldn't remember exactly what happened. He just remembered blood splattered on his face and turning to see Negan give one last blow to the man, his head completely concave now. Anything after that was a blur. Time in the warehouse seemed to pass quickly and by the time Negan to Carl to his car it was two in the morning. What'd they do for three hours? 

"For what it's worth," Negan grinned, "The red does complement your eyes, kid." He looked at Carl before he started to drive back home. "Cat got your tongue?" The older reached over to touch Carl's leg.

Carl tensed before shoving the hand away. "Don't fucking touch me." He hissed.

"Listen, I know you're shaken up here, and I give you a lot of chances ‘cause you’re cute.” Negan said. “But you better keep in mind that you can't talk to me any kind of way. Now I won't force myself onto you, I'm not that kind of guy. Tell me and I'll stop." He said honestly.

"I want you to stop." Carl's voice cracked a bit as he spoke, "Stop flirting with me and touching me."

"Okay."

And he kept his promise.

…….

"Carl…" Rick looked at his son who was completely zoned out. 

Carl was pulled out of his trance when his father rested a hand on his shoulder. He flinched, pulling away.

"You gonna stare at your cereal all day or eat it?" His father leaned closer, "Are you okay? You've been distant all week, more than usual. Is it something to do with Enid? I heard you two when you were arguing over some guy."

"You heard us?" Carl's eyes widened. "I-"

"Just bits and pieces Carl." Rick assured, "I couldn't make out everything. I didn't want to eavesdrop." 

Carl looked that about his dad, his was slightly less overbearing than his mother.

He looked down, stirring his spoon around in his soggy cereal. 

"Are you…" Rick paused, "Were you fighting over a guy?" He asked cautiously.

"We...not exactly." Carl mumbled, "Are you really trying to discreetly ask me if I'm gay? After I've told you numerous times that I'm not?" He looked up at his father.

"Sorry, I just-"

"I think I like both." He cast his glance downward. Carl wasn't sure why he told him that. Maybe he just needed to desperately release some kind of information to lift all the burden and secrets he harbored. The teen only had room for so much and it hurt that he had to let that secret go in order to hold onto all of Negan's secrets. It didn't feel as good as he imagined it would. He still felt dirty.

"You know I support you no matter what, right? I want what's best for you. What you think is best for you."

"I know dad…"

"...So, will I get to meet this boy, or…?" Rick chuckled as his son immediately shook his head. "Okay, I can respect that."

Carl slipped a few pieces of the wet, mushy cereal into his mouth. The dissolving, sugary mush left a bad taste in his mouth. It tasted just as wrong as this all felt.

"I'm off to work, I'll see you later." He stood, ruffling Carl's hair before kissing the top of his head, "I can't wait until you're ready for me to meet him." He smiled before he headed out.

You've already met him, Carl thought to himself. This was all too fucked. What was he going to do?

As he walked into the school he only knew one thing, he couldn't tell Enid. Well, that's if she was even willing to talk to him. She was still very angry with him. 

"I found out why Beth has been acting weird all month." Enid rushed up to him. Guess she was willing to talk.

He had completely forgotten about Beth's problems. As selfish as it sounded, he was sure that his was bigger. Beth once cried for weeks because one of her cows died. Boo-fucking-hoo.

Fuck. That sounded sinister. Negan was rubbing off on him.

"You know her sister, right? Well, her boyfriend is missing."

"For a month? " Carl raised his brows. 

"Yes, I think it was Negan." Enid hissed.

"What makes you say that?" 

"Because you fuck face, I saw a picture that Beth showed me. Asian man, shortish hair. He looked just like him. And remember what Negan said that night?"

He won't get to marry his hot, very pregnant girlfriend.

"And Beth says she thinks Maggie knows something. She hasn't really been pushing for more police investigation and she's been distant. Carl, we have to turn him in." She frowned, "and I fucking know her gave you that scratch on your fucking cheek! You were with him again, but you won't tell me!" Enid was yelling in the middle of the hallway, gathering attention from students.

"Enid...stop." Carl looked around, "This isn't the time or place for this." He said, brushing past her and heading to class. 

Carl's focus all day was nonexistent. He was thankful that his day came to an end fairly quick. The teen avoided contact with Enid. She needed to calm down; way down. 

On his walk home, Negan pull up next to the sidewalk on his motorcycle. "Oh, look at you blue eyes, walking home like a fuckin' bum. When ya getting your license?"

Carl continued walking and Negan trailed behind, slow riding on the bike. "I don't like driving." This earned a short from the older. He turned towards Negan, "What do you want?"

"I want to get home and eat my ice cream, and see if my neighbor wanted a ride home." Negan shrugged.

"Where were you just coming from?" Carl frowned.

"Woah, mom. Didn't know I had to check in with you about my whereabouts, blue eyes." Negan grinned, "Come have a bowl of ice cream with me and we'll talk about a few things."

"...Did you know what time I got outta school?" Carl crossed his arms.

Negan just winked before handing him a his helmet. "Maybe I'll buy you your own helmet and give you a ride to school everyday. You like pink you little pussy?"

Carl snatched the helmet. "Do you ever shut up? " He strapped on the helmet before climbing onto the bike. 

"Wrap your arms around me, can't you flying off." Negan said. 

Carl wrapped his arms around Negan's torso, pressing closer as Negan took off. He closed his eyes tight at first feeling scared but after he relaxed he realized it was a bit freeing. He actually liked this. It felt like riding a bike for the first time all over again. 

It did surprise him how safe he felt. Maybe because he and Negan shared this secret, this burden. As fucked up as it was, it felt like they were in this together, for the last murderer at least. Negan would probably even consider himself a perfect gentleman even. He hadn't laid a finger on Carl since the teen told him not to. Carl didn't want to say his missed the flirting and the touching and the teasing, but he did. He wanted Negan to touch him, he liked when Negan told him he was attractive. He's also wanted the murders to stop keeping him up at night. 

Carl looked up at the older, his gelled hair was slightly disturbed by the wind. Negan looked damn near perfect. Any girl would swoon over him. He was the embodiment of a bad boy. 

Negan turned his head and Carl was now looking at Negan's profile. The older grinned slightly before looking straight ahead, that is until Carl's hands sunk low onto his waist. Negan looked down and Carl felt the vibration of Negan's laugh. His chest tingled at the tremble of laughter he felt; it made him grip tighter onto Negan, press closer. Carl wanted Negan. 

And his theory that he was getting over his crush, was a bold faced lie. He knew he still liked Negan just as much as he did day one. 

They pulled up to Negan's driveway. The older flipped the kickstand and hopped off first because it seemed like Carl was a little dazed. 

"Kid, I know my baby is cool and her pussy purrs like you wouldn't believe, but you gotta get off." Negan said, holding out a hand. He helped Carl off before helping him take off the helmet. Carl's cheeks were flushed and he had tears welling up in his eyes. 

"Why do I still like you?" Carl asked, "It doesn't make sense."

"You're seventeen, nothing makes sense." Negan said softly, "When you're an adult you'll realize how fucked this is. You'll find yourself a pretty little wife or husband. And you'll sit down and think 'huh, my neighbor was hot as fuck, but he was fucked up.' And you'll think about how if you saw me again you'd deck me across these fucking face." He said before grinning, "But for now, you have a crush on me… and you're popping semi in your jeans." Negan chuckled as he headed inside. 

Carl tugged his shirt down as he headed inside with Negan. "Negan…" he leaned against the door and the older turned around looking at him. "I want you to touch me."

Negan smiled, "Never heard you admit it before, it makes this shit all too real. This is beyond me teasing you, this is really your fantasy."

"It is. I hate it. I fucking hate it, but it is." Carl said, looking down. "I'm a shitty person. I know what you did and still I-" 

Negan walked to Carl, leaning close to him. "You know how many people fantasize about serial killers, kid? There's girls out there who's pussies get fucking drenched when they hear Ted Bundy's name." He paused, "Hell, even my dick leaks a little when I hear Ted Bundy's name."

"This isn't some fascination with a murderer. I'm attracted to you."

"And I'm attracted to Ted Bundy. You ever seen that motherfucker? Now I don't kill women and I'd never dream of raping somebody. He's a piece of shit and deserves to rot in hell, but you best fucking believe, if he was still alive, I'd do the freaky deaky with him." Negan chuckled. 

Did he have a point in some fucked up way? 

Negan walked to his kitchen and Carl followed. 

"Did that guy from last week really not do anything?"

"He killed two of my men. I just wanted to fuck with ya."

Carl frowned as he sat at the table. Negan slid over a tub of ice cream and had two spoons in hand. He scooped up the vanilla ice cream onto a spoon and held it to Carl's lips. Negan seemed to take pleasure in watching Carl's lips wrap around the spoon. 

"Look at you. You have such pretty little lips on you." Negan watched Carl blush as he slowly slid the spoon out. The older popped the spoon into his own mouth, sucking off any of the remaining ice cream before handing it back to Carl. "Once you're nice and legal I'm going to eat you the fuck up, that is, if you'll let me."

"I will. You know I will." Carl admitted.

"Until then," Negan trailed his thumb over Carl's bottom lip, "I'm going to keep flirting with your daddy to piss you off."

Carl shoved Negan’s hand away, “Fuck you.” He took another spoonful ice cream, stuffing his mouthful of the chocolate.

“Did you like killing people?” Negan smirked, leaning in close as he watched Carl swallow.

“No.”

“I like killing people.” Negan’s voice was low and raspy. He was close, wiping away the chocolate smudged on Carl’s lips. The teen caught his thumb between his lips causing the older to chuckle softly. “Look at you.” Carl’s lips were surprisingly full. They were red from the chill of the ice cream.

Carl blushed lightly as he pulled away.

“You seem pretty calm for someone who was boohooing and crying last week. Not scared anymore?” Negan dipped into the vanilla, licking the spoon.

Carl watched intently as he spoke, “I think I panic more when I’m not around you than when I am; does that make sense?” Negan looked at him, raising his brows. “I mean like, this is our secret. I don’t have to worry about a slip up when you’re around. I’m not...forcing myself to think deliberately about certain things. I also realize that I’ve been so caught up in this that I hadn’t really noticed my friend Beth was upset.” He frowned, “Negan...you killed her sister’s boyfriend.”

Negan chuckled, grinning slightly, “Shit, I’m sorry. It’s his fault really. He owed me and he couldn’t deliver in the end.”

“He owed you money?” Carl asked, “You killed someone over money?” 

“Look, he owed me three months worth. That little fucker shouldn’t have came to me if he couldn’t deliver on his promise.”

“He came to you?” Carl looked away for a moment before Negan scooped up more ice cream and fed it to him. Everything felt so casual right now, like they were friends.

“Yeah, he got mixed up with some other fuckers and he asked for my protection. I said yes for a fuckin' fee. Maggie knew he made this fuckin' deal, so for her to even point the finger at me would be foolish. I just feel sorry the pretty little bitch doesn’t get a body to bury. She’ll have to live knowing that everyone else thinking he’s missing. She cannot tell a single motherucking soul.” Negan licked the spoon. “That’s if the other people the asian kid made enemies with don’t get to her themselves.”

"You can't let them do that! Beth would be devastated!" Carl frowned, "What the fuck Negan, you'd actually let this happen? She's pregnant."

Negan raised his eyebrows, amused, "Well, first off Beth will be dead too probably. And second, she's not my baby mama, the fuck I give two shits about her for?" He took a big scoop of ice cream, forcing it into Carl's mouth when the teen was about to speak.

Carl glared at Negan, mouth completely full as he started to swallow down the mouthful of ice cream. 

"I think we can work out a deal." Negan grinned, leaning in and wrapped his hand around the bottom of Carl's face so that his fingers rested on his cheeks. He squeezed Carl's cheeks and leaned closer to lick the ice cream that slipped past his lips.

Carl's mind spun at a million miles per second as Negan's wet tongue trailed across his lips. He leaned in closer, chasing after the feeling as Negan pulled back. 

"You want a kiss, Baby Boy?" Negan rasped softly.

Carl wanted to say no, of course, but his brain couldn't function. He just dumbly looked at Negan, his eyes gliding down to his lips.

Negan chuckled, pressing two fingers to his own lips, kissing them, before pressing them to Carl's. Just like he had before when he was drunk as all hell.

Carl finished the ice cream, sticking his tongue out to glide his tongue between the fingers, tasting the sticky dessert that had somehow ended up on the other's fingers. He accepted the finger that dove into his mouth, suckling on them. "You got some kinda finger fetish, boy?" Negan's voice was low and made Carl shiver. Did he have a finger fetish? He didn't think so, but here he was with Negan's fingers in his mouth for the second time this month.

"You feel nice, like a wet pussy in this pretty little mouth of yours." Carl blushed at the comparison. This was the point that Negan started to thrust his In Carl's mouth at a slow pace, "I bet you can take a dick buried down your throat like a fuckin' champ." The teen let out a moan, that he was immediately embarrassed by, but Negan seemed to like it. "You're going to accompany me on every single little thing I ask you to join me on, got that?" Negan slipped his fingers out of Carl's mouth and into his own, sucking them clean before slipping them out with an obnoxious pop. "You got that?"

"I'm not going with you on a murder spree around town." Carl huffed, crossing his arms over his chest, still a bit dazed from Negan's actions more seconds ago.

"Then tell Beth and the pregnant hot lady good bye." Negan said simply as he stood.

"Fine. I'll do it." Carl growled as he stood about to leave but Negan tugged him back by his hair, a move he somehow loved and hated all in one.

Negan pulled the boy in front of him and yanked his hair again so that the other was staring at him. "You not goin' to say thank you, Baby Boy?"

"Thank you." Carl gritted his teeth as he stared at the other. Staring up at the other's face did nothing for the gentle throb between his legs, in fact the gentle part started to dissipate and morph into something on a whole new level.

"I own you now sweetheart." Negan tightened his grip on the long locks, smirking when Carl whined needily. "You will do whatever I say."

Carl didn't argue with that last statement, probably because the blood was nonexistent in his brain, rushing down between his legs, his wobbly, very unstable legs. There was a weird pang of pleasure the erupted in his stomach, it didn't go away, he didn't want it to go away. For the first time since meeting Negan he felt satisfied with their encounter. The older could leave him hard and needily like this and it'd be okay. He'd go home and wrap his fingers around himself and imagine it was Negan. Carl would think about how that wet tongue would feel against him. 

"You're just naturally submissive aren't you?" Negan grinned, raising his brows."That shit makes me very fuckin' happy boy." He tugged the hair harder and Carl whined, closing his eyes. "Hey, look at me." He watched Carl swallow thickly and close his eyes tighter. "I said fuckin' look at me." Baby blues suddenly flashed at him as Carl opened his eyes; they seemed a bit watery. The ache between the teen's legs must've been getting to him. "Meet me here tomorrow night. Bring a bag, inside put a change of clothes, and a weapon of your choice. Tie your hair back in a ponytail, no loose strands and make sure it's in a bun. Wear black clothes, socks and shoes. Don't be late, got it?"

Carl nodded before wincing at the sudden yank of his hair. 

"A verbal answer."

"Yes, I got it." Carl hissed, the pain of his stands being pulled felt so foreign but good. He was definitely finding out through Negan what he liked. 

"See you later. I'll be over for boys night. Don't go actin' jealous when I tell your daddy how fuckin' cute he is. You shouldnt anyway because you know I think you're just and fuckin' cute, if not cuter." Negan said firmly. "See yourself out." He said simply and just like that Carl was left alone, disappearing into some back room.

.

"Maggie doesn't seem helpful in giving any answers though." Rick said, looking over to Shane who sat on the couch adjacent from him. "I don't understand it."

"Maybe she killed him? Or had a hit put out on him?" Shane offered with a shrug. "It's been a month. I'd be surprised if the GBI doesn't step in. I mean, are we really going to assume he's just missing?"

"It's only been a month or so, Shane. And GBI only gets involved at the sheriff's request." Rick pointed to himself.

"Yeah, or if the governor decides, or high ranking officials or the judge or-" 

"Fuck, Shane. I know the law." Rick hissed. 

"Like fuckin' hell. Rick, you know what happens if we drag our feet on this case? Public outrage. Why ain't the Sheriff's department doing more! Let's get cadaver dogs."

"Look, I don't wanna assume the worst. I ain't sayin' it's murder." Rick shook his head, sipping on his beer.

"I heard he frequented that old warehouse. Someone bought it ya know. Dunno who'd want that piece of shit. Get some dogs out there and I bet you'll find something worth while." Shane stood to grab another beer from the kitchen. Rick seemed to dwell on this fact for a moment, sitting still and staring straight forward. 

Carl was listening from the stairs, now staring at his dad. His brows furrowed slightly. Should he warn Negan? He'd imagine that the dogs would only find something if Negan and his men disposed of the body on site. Carl knew that Negan was way smarter than that, this obviously wasn't his first rodeo when it came to murdering someone. 

Carl bit his lip and went back up the stairs. He'd have to think about this.

.


	3. Playing God

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan and Carl get violent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love me a good toxic relationship.

"Ow! You're pulling too hard, Negan!" 

It was the night of whatever the fuck they were supposed to do. Negan wouldn't fill him in on any real details.

"If you did what I said we wouldn't have this problem." Negan growled, completely annoyed with the teen. 

He pulled Carl's hair, the younger felt Negan's bandaged hand and uninjured hand work together. No stray hairs were left because Carl was so sure that Negan just pulled so tight that his fucking hair was snatched out the follicles.

"Listen, you're gonna do what you're told, okay?" Negan patted the side of Carl's face. "I'm gonna keep you safe, but you gotta fuckin' listen or this'll go down hill quickly."

"Okay, but what the fuck are we doin'?" Carl asked, "...Don't tell me we're gonna…" He trailed off. He knew what they were doing deep; of course he did. Carl just didn't want it to be real. He felt sick when he saw Negan smirk at him. "Negan…" he said softly. "Who?..."

"Why are you always worried about who? Does it make it any easier when they're dead, Carl?" Negan asked annoyed, "Haven't you ever heard you're not supposed to fuckin' name your fuckin' farm animals?"

"You're comparing farm animals to humans?" Carl asked in disbelief. 

"You're being dramatic." Negan scoffed, rolling his eyes.

"And you're placing a price on a human life that you have no business placing. That's not right; what makes you think you are the end all be all of life?"

"...'Cause a how good lookin' I am." A sick grin spread across Negan's lips, deepening his dimples, his tongue poking out from his teeth ever so slightly. "You wanna think you're gonna be my moral compass baby, fine; but you sure as shit are not gonna hinder my operation because you got your tail tucked between your fuckin' pussy." Negan squeezed the teen's cheeks, making his voice really low, almost dangerous, making Carl want to listen right away. "Keep that in fuckin' mind baby." He said. "Take that bag," the older turned Carl's head in the direction on the floor of a black duffel bag, "And fuckin' put it in the back of my car. And tonight you focus on me and me only." He then released Carl, pushing him backwards slightly as he did. Carl stumbled a bit, grumbling to himself as he picked up the heavy bag and headed outside to the car. 

.

The ride was relatively quiet. Negan seemed focused and determined as if this was a real profession. Carl couldn't wrap his head around it. This man that he was lusting after is a real life assassin. It still scared Carl to death; he hated to admit it, but he was getting desensitized to the fact. 

They pulled up to a curb on a pretty dark road. There wasn't a house for miles. Panic surfaced in Carl's chest, making his breathing uneven and almost nonexistent. Was this where he died? Was Negan going to dump his body in a nearby field after killing him brutally. 

Carl's thoughts were halted when Negan grabbed his face and forced the younger to look at him. "What did I fuckin' say? You focus on me; don't let one single thought float into your pretty little head that isn't about me or this operation. You fuckin' got that?"

"How can I focus on something that I don't know anything about? I don't know about this operation and I sure as fuck don't know anything about you." Carl shoved Negan's hand away.

"You focus on what I tell you to. You gotta trust me." Negan said as he got out of the car.Negan slammed the door and Carl flinched, taking a deep breath before he decided to finally step out.

Negan lodged a duffel bag Carl's way, making him stumble back a bit, almost falling. He glared at the man as he slung the bag over his shoulder. "Where the fuck are we walking to?" He mumbled, following behind Negan who was already walking down a narrow path after he locked the car. 

"Shut up, boy." Negan said, glancing over his shoulder and made a weird hissing sound, something an owner might to to his dog to get them to come here. The older man did the "sst" again when Carl didn't listen the first time and it was accompanied by a finger pointing at the spot next to him. Carl found himself obeying the command, walking faster to match Negan's pace. 

"I'm not a dog." Carl mumbled, struggling to keep up.

"You sure as shit just came like one." Negan said, though his voice held no humor. He seemed to be very serious about this, whatever this was. 

All Carl knew for sure was that there was going to be a casualty tonight. It made Carl nauseous to even think about. He wasn't okay with this but at the same time he had no real choice in the matter. Negan owned him, he owned him like you would a dog.

As they kept walking a house came into view, it was a modest house, not much bigger than Carl's. Picking the lock with ease, he nudged the door and left his boots at the door, Carl did the same. They crept through the house until Negan stopped; the wink that Negan threw his way sent a chill down his spine. It felt wrong. When Negan opened the door there was a man, sound asleep in his bed, snoring lightly. He looked pretty young from what Carl could tell.

With a gloved hand Negan reached into his jacket pocket, producing a pocket knife. The older man stood in the middle of the room now and Carl watched from the doorway as Negan slid off his jacket, letting it fall to the ground with the soft sound of leather and a metal zipper hitting the hardwood floor. The younger scurried in to pick it up when the older man pointed to it, clearly wanting Carl to pick it up. 

Carl found himself holding the jacket tightly, the smell of real leather and Negan were so strong. He pulled it tighter to himself when Negan started creepin' towards the bed. The younger's breath caught in his throat as Negan gripped the knife tightly. The older made a swift motion and stabbed right in the center of the man's neck. 

Whoever this was was awake now, flailing in the bed, producing this awful continuous squeak that radiated through the room. Carl's breathing now came out in gasps as his heartbeat sped up exponentially. 

Negan called him over and Carl hesitantly walked over to the older, dropping the jacket to the floor. The teen now stood over a gurgling man who had blood pooling around his neck. Negan pulled the knife out and a disgusting spray of red splattered all over his white shirt. 

The knife was handed to Carl, "One of the best places to strike is the throat." Carl listened as he watched the light die out of the man's eyes. The man on the bed stared at him with cold, lifeless eyes, judging him, shaming him. "Another right in the temple." Negan turned the man's head pointing to the side of his head, "Need a better knife for that. If you can get close enough, the eye is hella deadly. Try it." The older causally turned the end back towards them again. 

The way Negan spoke sounded like he was in some informative after school special. 

Carl shook his head trying to retreat but Negan pressed against his back harder. "Do it." He hissed in the teen's ear harshly, causing Carl to involuntarily shiver. Negan pulled back and then yelled, "Fuckin' do it Carl!"

Carl felt hot tears roll down his cheeks add he pulled back the knife and swiftly stabbed the man in the eye. The squish of the knife entering was disgusting; it almost made him vomit. 

"Under the armpit there's a major artery. It's the last place a person expects. You find yourself in a fuckin' bind, if the armpit is open for the money shot, you take it." Negan said, helping Carl pull the knife from the eyeball. He positioned it at the armpit, getting the angle just right. "Push it in." Ther older said, sliding his hand up Carl's arm until it rested up on his shoulder. 

Carl looked away and made the motion quick. That was until Negan forcefully turn the younger's head to make him look. 

"See how it's already bleeding around the knife? That how you know you got the right spot. 'S coming out like a fuckin' fountain"

"I hate you…" Carl murmured through hot tears. "I fucking hate you." He yanked his head away from Negan's tight grip and he squeezed his eyes shut, hoping maybe when he opened them he'd be back in his bed, or at the bar with Enid anywhere but here. He let go of the knife, feeling the sound of blood rushing out amplified in his ears. Carl ignored the sick, fleshy sound of Negan reaching around him to grab the murder weapon. 

"You think I give one flyin' fuck what the fuck you fuckin' think of me?" Negan hissed in the younger's ear. He grabbed Carl and pushed him down on the ground. "I could kill you right now and who would know?" The older's shoeless foot pressed hard on Carl's back and the teen felt like he was going to break one of his ribs or something. “Answer me! Who the fuck would know?”

“Negan, please.” Carl wheezed, feeling the pressure increase. Hot tears trailed down his cheeks. “Negan!” 

“The second time you met me I was bashin’ someone’s brains out like I was a lil’ fuckin' kid bustin’ open his first pinata.” Negan said, “You think I care about what happens here? You think I have sympathy for a kid with a boner the size of California for me, huh?”

Carl let out an ugly sob, trying to crawl away from under the pressure of Negan’s foot, but the man was too strong. “Fuck...you…” The teen was able to wheeze out.

“Fuck me, huh?” Negan smiled, removing his foot as he reached down to lift Carl up by the his shirt. “Bet you still wanna fuck me even after this. My big cock in that pretty lil’ ass. You finger yourself Carl? Long lil’ fingers desperately tryna reach that special spot inside of you while you think of me.”

Carl clenched his jaw and as Negan pulled him to his feet, Carl swung as hard as he could. His fist connected with the man's nose and Carl watched as the older man recoiled. Then the teen shivered at the sight of the sinister grin that crossed Negan's lips, blood dripping from his nose down to stain his pearly white teeth. Negan's tongue skirted across his teeth, collecting the blood and spitting it in Carl's face. Before he could even react, large hands were around his neck, back was slammed against the nearest wall.

"Real fuckin' ballsy. You're lucky as shit that I have a soft spot for you." He wiped the blood from under his nose and smeared it across Carl's cheek, other hand still squeezing the teen's throat. Negan listened to Carl struggle for air, watching him claw at his hand. Negan finally let go and Carl was left gasping for air. The older man still cornered him against the wall, arms now, leaning against it as he leaned in the closer the younger. "You wanna kiss me?" He said lowly, almost teasingly.

Carl coughed a few more times, trying to calm his breathing. It took a while and he leaned against Negan's chest, gripping at the older's shirt. He just shook his head, pressing his forehead against Negan's chest as tears fell down his cheeks.”No, Negan. I don’t” His voice cracked and he hated it. 

Negan lifted Carl’s chin and frowned. “You just punched me, which was one of the hottest things you've ever done since I met you, kid. You are fuckin’ tough, you hear me?” Carl sniffled, trying to turn his head from Negan but the older stopped him, resting his hands in the younger’s cheeks and his thumbs wiped Carl’s tears, “Badasses do not fuckin’ cry, Grimes.” He grinned and somehow Carl wanted to melt into a puddle. It was dysfunctional, but Carl couldn’t help it at all. “You got me fucked up.” Negan leaned in, lips brushing against Carl’s, “Somethin’ is fuckin’ special ‘bout you. I can fuckin’ feel it.”

Carl shivered, pressing closer to Negan, “There’s a dead guy right next to us, Negan.” He gripped the sides of Negan’s shirt, tugging hard. “Negan...I wanna go home. Please.”

“Okay, okay.” Negan nodded, his features seeming to soften. “You did a great job, baby boy. You’ll be ready for the next time for sure.” 

Carl frowned, turning his head so that his lips weren’t pressed against Negan’s. “Let’s go.”

\---  
When they pulled up to Negan’s house, Carl stumbled out of the car and threw up in the grass. He was crying again, gasping for air as he tried not to panic. “Fuck, Negan. What did we do? Oh my god…”

"Jesus, kid. I wouldn't have made that joke if I knew you were gonna freak out." Negan chuckled, grabbing Carl up by his shirt and throwing him over his shoulder like a rag doll. 

"Fuck you, let me go home!" Carl shouted, pounding on Negan's back.

"If you wake the whole fuckin' neighborhood, you'll be sorry." Negan said as he opened the door, closing it behind him. He kicked off his shoes onto a mat before reaching to pull off Carl's. The older then headed upstairs, still carrying the teen, and went straight to the bathroom. Everything already had plastic over it, even the floor of the shower, excluding the drain. 

Negan didn't say much as he started to pull off Carl's shirt. The teen slapped the older man's hand away, backing away from him. He looked down at his shirt. There was more blood than he remembered, it made him feel queasy, feel dirty. That was because he did. No matter how he tried to rationalize it he couldn't help the disgust he felt. Negan made him do it. 

Negan yanked the teen forward, "You gotta fuckin' cooperate. Didn't I fuckin' say that I'd take care of you?" He grabbed Carl's face, squeezing his cheeks as tears started to roll down them. He let go of Carl's face and started taking his dirty shirt off once more. Carl struggled still, angry cries and curses flew from the kids mouth. He was met with even more resistance when Negan started working on his pants. Eventually he got them off though, not without him pushing Carl to the floor and yanking them off roughly.

Carl laid there on the floor, crying and vulnerable on the plastic, probably thinking the worst of the situation. He closed his legs, hiding the front of his tight black underwear from view. He started shaking and Negan scoffed. "What the fuck do you think I'm going to do to you, kid?" He frowned, "You think if I was gonna fuckin' have sex with you I'd have to rape you?" An angry expression crossed the other man's face, "You already damn near pop a fuckin' boner every goddamn time I fuckin' see you! I haven't made a single advance that you didn't want and when you said back off, I fuckin' did!" 

Carl backed away at Negan's tone, crying even more now. He was scared. Who wouldn't be? In a matter of months he became the sidekick to a fucking murderer. One that liked complete and total power, that liked to make Carl uncomfortable while also assuring that he'd be safe. He couldn't imagine how Negan could keep him safe at all times. It was an irrational promise. 

Negan had enough of waiting and he yanked Carl up by the hair angrily. Carl scratched at his hand in a futile attempt to get Negan to let go. 

Carl felt Negan bandaged hand slide his underwear down, making him feel like he was going to vomit. He was now naked, exposed to this man that he had witnessed commit murder three times now. The teen never imagined that this would be the way Negan saw him naked, if at all. Carl was being pulled to the shower by his hair and Negan tossed him into the tub after pulling back the shower curtain. He was on his hands and ugly sobs racked his body. Scorching water hit his back, making him yell out before Negan adjusted it properly. "Get up." He barely heard Negan say over the hot water that pounded on his head, making his hair cling to his face. The teen could barely even breath as the water clouded his senses, filling his mouth and nose. 

"Get up!" Negan yelled, watching the teen tense. Carl struggled to his feet, slipping a few times; he looked pathetic and sad, a shell of a human being whose life went to complete and utter shit. There Carl now stood before him, shaking, sobbing and covering his junk from him. He watched the blood wash down the drain for a moment. Negan moved closer, watching Carl tense once more, not even relaxing as Negan slicked his hair back, moving it from his face with gentle hands. He looked Carl in the eyes as Carl's baby blues met his.

There was something in Negan's eyes that Carl couldn't quite read, but there was no denying it was there. The moment didn't last long as Negan pulled away. "I can wash myself." He said, voice not sounding like he wanted it to. It trembled, shaking so much that he could barely get his words out. "I don't need your help."

"I didn't fuckin' ask now did I?" Negan said, returning with a cloth with, wiping off Carl's face. "I told you, I'll take care of you. You're gonna let me do it without any more complaining." Negan said before he pulled back and poured soap onto the rag.

The younger watched as the hot, soapy cloth touched his skin, guided by Negan's hand. Carl couldn't deny that he enjoyed it, even when Negan washed his arms and under his arms and down his sides. Everything sent chills rushing through his body, down his spine. It wasn't until Negan's bare hand touched his hip that Carl felt weak in the knees, grabbing Negan's shoulder tight to steady himself as his breathing picked up. Negan's other hand with the cloth started at his ankle washing their way up to his mid thigh before giving the other leg the same treatment. 

Not once did Negan look at him with an ounce of sexual intentions. In hindsight, Negan did say he'd take care of the younger. He might have been a little less rough if Carl had cooperated to begin with. The older's now gently moving hands gave Carl the idea that was true. 

Negan washed between the younger's legs carefully, seeming to ignore Carl's slight moan and increased breathing, before he turned the teen around and started washing his back. Needless to say, the older man washed every inch of the younger, right down to his feet. 

It was calming to Carl in a way. It felt kind of nice to have a moment to breath and relax, to push away the heinous crime that he'd committed. His emotions were a Rollercoaster around Negan. It went up, down, sideways and anywhere in-between. It wasn't healthy, but he couldn't shake his attraction. The attraction so invaded his personal bubble that he couldn't think rationally. This man threatened him, hurt him, turned him into a murderer, had a crush on his dad and essentially blackmailed him. This man also was washing his hair like a pro right now, taking care of him despite being the cause of the mess of blood on Carl's body, and he made Carl melt into a puddle at the drop of a dime. Why did being attractive excuse Negan's behavior?

"See?" Negan massaged Carl's scalp, watching the boy finally lean into his touch and relax more. "I wanna help you, kid. This is on me. This is all on me. And I told you I'd take care of it." He rinsed the teen's hair out from all the shampoo before conditioning it. 

After that Carl felt a warm, fluffy towel being wrapped around him right after the water shut off. When he stepped out he gripped the towel tightly, the chill that ran down his back wasn't a pleasant one by any means. Negan stepped in front of him to dry his hair, not being too rough or too gentle. 

Carl swallowed thickly thinking about the extra clothes Negan had told him to pack. Was he supposed to go home? How could he sleep tonight in his house thinking about what he had done. He couldn't brace that by himself, he just couldn't. 

"Negan, I…" The younger paused for a second to think about what he was saying, or was going to say rather. What could he say? "I can't…'M scared. I don't know what I'm doing and I hate it. I hate you for...putting me in this, getting me involved. But I don't think…"

Carl was lost in thought for a moment before he felt Negan pick him up and throw him over his shoulder. The younger didn't fight this, because he knew it'd be a futile effort. It didn't go well for him to disobey the first time, so what would make this time any different? He felt relaxed as Negan placed him on his bed, feeling safe. Despite all that had happened he believed that Negan wouldn't let anything bad happen to him, the promise that no one would find out Carl's involvement. 

The older man pulled out the long black socks that Carl had packed from the duffel bag and left his other clothes, leaving the younger confused when he didn't pull out the clothes he had packed. "I'm supposed to walk home naked?" He said, trying to lighten up a bit. Everything felt so somber and dull. Carl figured he couldn't wallow in sadness forever. 

"You’re not going home." Negan said simply, leaving to go grab one of his oversized t-shirts, well it'd be oversized for Carl at least. He slid back out from his closet. The older pulled the shirt over Carl's head followed by him sliding on the socks.

Carl decided to relaxed, enjoying Negan taking care of him. It was silly, but it felt quite intimate, like a tender after murder moment between the two of them. "How often are we gonna have to do that...killing people I mean…" The younger asked softly as he tucked his legs underneath himself. 

"It's not like this shit is always planned...I can't say really. Maybe once or twice a month? Sometimes more. I'll choose which ones you'll go on." Negan shrugged as he leaned Carl back to lie down. 

"How will you choose?" Carl asked, looking to Negan, watching as the other returned his gaze.

"Just depends on who the fuck it is. Also, some of these things are outta the city, sometimes outta the state." Negan chuckled, "As much as I'd love to take a road trip with ya, I don't think that'd be able to happen. Ain't practical and it leaves too much to chance. Daddy comes looking for ya and I'm caught outta state with ya? It's all over. I know you'd be grateful for that."   
Negan laughed, letting his eyes trail over Carl for a moment. The teen must've forgotten he wasn't wearing any underwear because he had his legs spread a little and Negan had a clear view of everything.

He reached to grab the shirt to pull it down, but Carl reached and grabbed his wrist, stopping him. The older raised his brows as he looked up to the other's face, now blushing red. "There's that blush…" He said, "Now that is down right adorable."

Carl resisted the urge to close his legs, but not opening them wider either. His body felt like it was on fire now. "In the shower...why didn't you...I thought you found me attractive?" 

"Time and place…" Negan said simply. "You think the time to thirst over ya is when you're scared, cryin' and afraid of me?" 

"What about now? Is it the time and place?" He asked, nervously tugging Negan closer until the other got the hint. The younger looked up at the murderer that was now positioned over him and took a deep breath.

"Oh it's most definitely the place. Right here in this bed with you, looking adorable in my fuckin' shirt. But it's not the time. I told you already, when you're eighteen, kid." Negan marveled at the plump lips that tried not to pout. "Look, you should experience sex with someone else anyway." He laughed, "I'm not the guy you wanna call your first."

"I'm not saying to have sex with me right now. I don't think I'll be ready for that for a very long time, Negan." Carl sighed, "I just wanna know if you like me...I mean...I wanna know if you're interested…" Carl said, "You're so hard to read...I dunno if you're just messing with me half the time. I hate that."

There was a pause for a good while and Negan just stared down at the teen before he smirked, "I thought I made it clear the I'm gonna fuck your brains out when I'm good and fuckin' ready, but let me make it extra clear that I'm interested." He mumbled before pressing his lips against Carl's. The younger seemed to react positively, wrapping his arms around the older's neck as if to make sure Negan didn't go anymore. 

Negan settled over Carl more, properly getting into the kiss that he initially only wanted to be a peck, but he quickly found himself lost in it and it seemed Carl was too. His tongue slid into his mouth with ease, taking over the kiss rather quickly. 

After a moment Negan pulled back, not wanting to get too carried away, much to Carl's disappointment. The younger tried to pull him back down but Negan clearly was much stronger. 

"The lil' dark haired girl taught you how to kiss like that? I should thank her." Negan gave a lopsided grin as Carl snorted. 

"She hates you…" He paused for a moment, "She'd hate me too if she knew what I did tonight...or what I just did… kissing you like that…" 

It damn near broke Negan's stone cold heart to see the hurt cross Carl's face. "Well, damn. That sucks, baby boy.” He said, moving from over Carl. “To be fair she’s missin’ out on how hot you look plunging that knife into that man’s eyeball. The spray of the blood against that pretty pale skin did something sinful to my dick. I try my best not to be a sadist, but something about killin’ with a pretty partner is temptin’.” The older man grinned, looking down at the teen’s now clenched hands before his eyes wandered back up to the death stare of his eyes. Feisty fucking kid. 

Negan decided to move closer to Carl once more, climbing over him. The teen’s hands immediately went to Negan’s chest in an attempt to push him off. “What’s the matter? Not game anymore?” He laughed, not yet moving.

“Not when you’re being fucking disgusting, Negan!” Carl yelled, pushing Negan harder.

“We can’t change what we just did, kid.” Negan chuckled.

“Yeah but we don’t have to talk about it like some sexual fantasy. It’s not. It’s wrong! And the fact that it gets you off is disgusting!” Carl pulled his fist back, slamming it into Negan’s jaw as hard as he could. He took the moment to quickly sit up, sliding underneath Negan’s arm. Carl didn’t care anymore, Negan was sick and disgusting.

Negan was taken back for a moment but he chuckled and, without really looking, reached his hand out, wrapping it around Carl’s neck and slamming him back down roughly onto the bed.His hold was tight around the pale neck. He pressed hard initially before easing up. “You pretend you don’t like the violence, but you clearly do. Bet you’re just as violent as me. You’ll get there. You clearly are willin’ to disregard my violence when it comes to your horny teenage boy needs.” He said, now pressing harder on the teen’s neck again. “It’s dick hardening. To play God like that.” 

Carl struggled for breath as he clawed at Negan’s hands. He looked up at Negan and his teasing smirk. He was clearly toying with him, not going to seriously injure him, but it was still scary regardless. Negan sat up, chuckling as he let go of Carl. 

The teen swallowed thickly trying to regain his composure, trying to keep the tears away that pricked the corner of his eyes. “...How can you treat me so nice…” He mumbled after a moment, “Then choke the fuck out of me the next.” He rasped softly. 

“How can your dick get hard from that?” Negan rested a hand on Carl’s thigh, drawing the other’s attention between his legs. “Stop lying to yourself. You’re fucked up; you like it and that’s okay.” He said with a genuine smile.

Carl blushed red as he pulled the cover over himself. He hated himself for this. What was wrong with him?

“It’s vile the first few times, I know.” He said simply before he stood, started to walk away.

Carl just pulled the covers over his head, finally allowing himself to cry now that Negan was gone.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! Let me know what you think!! :)


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